Reblogged from The Huffington Post

Thanks for sending me this one, Fred!

Another shit-for-brains my-daddy-was-famous-non-celebrity with a funky name that hasn’t done jack-shit in life ex-addict telling us the facts of life.

Bijou Needs A Heaping Serving Of STFU Pie

As if their comic book Your Mommy Kills Animals isn’t strange enough, now they want to rename fish to Sea Kittens.

Yeah, those Land Kitten bitches just have all the luck.

How To Get Busted In One Easy Download
Cops: Suspects printed out armed robbery blueprint from Internet

DECEMBER 12–After a trio of Ohio women was busted earlier this week following a botched robbery attempt, cops searched the group’s getaway car and discovered printed instructions downloaded from the Internet that detailed “How To Commit Armed Robbery In Six Easy Steps.”

Source: The Smoking Gun

Here are the original instructions: How To Commit Armed Robbery In Six Easy Steps

Man Dies in Tragic Thanksgiving Accident

CHICAGO HEIGHTS– A man accidentally shot himself in the head Thursday afternoon in front of others during a Thanksgiving Day family gathering

William Agee, 30, of Buena Vista Ave., was pronounced dead at St. James Hospital and Health Centers in Chicago Heights at 5 p.m., the Cook County Medical Examiner’ aid.

The incident happened at 1661 School St. in Chicago Heights at 4:35 p.m., according to Chicago Heights Police Lt. Michael Romano.

“He thought the safety was on, put the gun to his head, squeezed the trigger and that was that,” Romano said.

Romano said the incident happened in front of other people. An autopsy is scheduled.

“Tragic accident” - yeah, as in tragically f’ing stupid.

Source: WBBM 780

And a dumb one at that:

MAC HATER SLASHED UP MY FACE
GOP GAL: MUGGER CARVED ‘B’ ON ME

Uh yeah the attacker actually took the time to carve a BACKWARDS B in her face. Hmmmm, seems a little ridiculous. That was done in the mirror. The black eye is another story though but hey if your crazy enough to carve a B into your face your probably crazy enough to punch yourself.

Update:Woman admits making up McCain sticker attack, police say

Commie faggott!

European socialist!

Sleazy scum of the earth.

Now that’s what I call eloquent

Rage rising on the McCain campaign trail

At a rally in Minnesota on Friday, a woman told McCain: “I don’t trust Obama. I have read about him and he’s an Arab.”

“And we’re all wondering why that Obama is where he’s at, how he got here. I mean, everybody in this room is stunned that we’re in this position,” another man said at Thursday’s rally.

Uh, you say that at a rally with… Sarah Palin??

“I’m mad. I’m really mad. And what’s going to surprise you, it’s not the economy. It’s the socialists taking over our country,” one said.

Makes me think of this song:

But sadly, it isn’t.

Palin on foreign policy

The Renewed Mind Is the Key

Dig the dance moves - I think the guy in the middle wasn’t even born yet when that shit was considered cool.

Found this gem on dlisted