Russia orders £2000 inflatable copies of planes, tanks and missiles to fool enemies

The Russian Defence Ministry has ordered elaborate inflatable copies of its most ubiquitous planes, tanks and missiles at a cost of almost £2,000 per model to fool its enemies in future conflicts.

Typo on Chad Ochocinco’s Cereal boxes sends charity-minded callers to a phone-sex line

As of Thursday afternoon, he [Chad Ochocinco] hadn’t mentioned the error in any of his frequent messages on the Twitter social media site. On Wednesday, he had urged fans to go to his website to order the cereal and “Start your day with a lil suga!!!”

Thanks, Chipp!

Finally, a realistic poll.

Goddamned hilarious

American readers have probably not been able to escape the controversy of the proposed building of the “Ground Zero Mosque” of late.

Here’s a very short recap. Basically, in 2009 a Muslim-run real estate company bought a building about two blocks away from Ground Zero.
So a company buys a building, big deal, right? Well, this company has decided to build an Islamic center and mosque on the property.
In a country that has over 250 JCCs (Jewish Community Centers), countless Christian-flavored churches, Buddhist, Hindu, Baha’i, Sikh, Unitarian facilites, etc., why are people so bothered about another Islamic meeting place (there are already over 1200 mosques in the US)?

Because it’s close to “Hallowed Ground”, that’s why.

Yes, the place where terrorists hit the World Trade Center on September 11, 2001 is a very special ground. I don’t know anybody whose life wasn’t changed on that day. By some extremists. That happened to be Muslim, but obviously unclear on the real message of the Q’ran.

Let’s see, only Muslims can be extremists, right? No. Actually, I have met far more Christian extremists in my lifetime, though none of them killed 3000 people. Just a few famous examples of Christian extremism: does anybody recall history lessons in school, specifically, the St. Bartholomew’s Day massacre in 1572? At least 2000 Huguenot Protestants (if not far more - statistics were crap back then) were killed by Catholic mobs in Paris and surrounding areas in France. The bombing of abortion clinics by the Army of God? And Northern Ireland, need I say more? And did you know the Ku Klux Klan consider themselves Christians?

There are fucked up people of all races and nationalities. It seems that religion is just the favorite excuse to exercise their “fucked-up-ness”, because religion tends to leave so much open to interpretation. Isn’t it funny what a fine line it is between saying “the voices in my head made me do it” (schizophrenia) and “God/Allah/Yippeedoodah made me do it” (religious extremism).

I won’t claim that I can even begin to comprehend what it must feel like to have lost a loved-one in the 9/11 attacks. I can imagine that it must suck that really, so far nobody has been truly held accountable or punished for it. But generalized hate against an entire religion is not the answer.

Again, it is not on Ground Zero. It is, in fact, two blocks away. How many blocks do you want to “hallow”?

The “Park51″ project, as it’s officially dubbed, is in fact planned for a site two blocks from where the World Trade Center towers fell, amid other lower Manhattan establishments whose names have never featured the words “Ground Zero.” If built, the 13-story community center and mosque project will be one of hundreds of buildings located within blocks of Ground Zero — a densely populated area that already includes a couple of mosques, along with less “hallowed” institutions, like strip clubs, bars and Off Track Betting operations.
(source: News outlets split in describing mosque, Michael Calderon)

And let’s be American about this: it’s a piece of privately owned property. In America, the land of the free, you can build whatever the hell you want to on your own property (I’m not a lawyer, so please correct me if I’m wrong). And the owners want to build a meeting and worship center for members of their religion. THAT’S ALL.

John Stewart of the Daily Show nails it:

And here’s an interesting page with
A few photos of stuff the same distance from the World Trade Center as the “Ground Zero Mosque”

(Thanks, Fred)

Seriously, can all you protestors just get over yourselves? Look beyond your front door and see what is going on in the world - 20 million (can you even imagine that number? I can’t) affected by floods in Pakistan, more than 220,000 killed in the Haiti earthquake, over 1,100 dead in China mudslide… and you’re worried about a Muslim center in New York? You’ve got to be kidding me.

Just my two cents…

Update:

How the “ground zero mosque” fear mongering began

Woman Gives USB Wedding Ring to Her Geeky Fiancé

The gold ring isn’t actually a functional USB drive, but its design is reminiscent of one. The interior is engraved with the words, “For a lifetime of memories,” an allusion to the USB’s storage capabilities.

(Click HERE for background music)

Man caught smuggling 18 monkeys in girdle

MEXICO CITY — A man with a mysterious bulge under his T-shirt was stopped, searched and detained at Mexico City’s international airport after authorities found 18 tiny endangered monkeys in a girdle he was wearing.

The Public Safety Department said in a statement Monday that 38-year-old Roberto Cabrera arrived on a commercial flight Friday from Lima, Peru, when authorities noticed the bulge and conducted a body search.

The department says Cabrera was carrying the 6-inch titi monkeys in pouches attached to the girdle. Two of the monkeys were dead.

Cabrera was arrested on charges of trafficking an endangered species.

Cabrera told authorities he was carrying the monkeys in a suitcase but decided to put them in his girdle “so the X-rays wouldn’t hurt them.”

Source: The Associated Press

Thanks, Lynda!

Okay, I’ll admit it. I am completely and perversely fascinated with the whole Mel Gibson / Oksana Grigorieva drama. If you haven’t been following it, here’s a brief summary: Mel left his wife of godknowshowmany years for Oksana, they had a baby together, later they split up. Oksana first claimed Mel hit her in the face, then “mysteriously”, several recorded phone calls featuring Mel and Oksana were released.

In these recordings, Mel is huffing and puffing, shouting and swearing, being racist/sexist, and basically just acting nuttier than a sack of weasels. Which is why I find the recordings so fascinating. That is, pitiful at the same time. Mel is clearly in severe psychological distress and having an emotional meltdown, yet we’re all laughing about it. Well, maybe if he weren’t such a bigoted asshole, I’d actually feel sorry for him.
My favorite quote:

Ok, I’ll burn the goddamn house up, but blow me first!

Yeah, there’s a man who’s got his priorities straight. So now the internet is running rampant with memes.

Here’s my favorite one:

Update: If you want to read excerpts of Mel’s rants, presented by adorable kittens to make them more palatable, clicke here: The 20 Worst Mel Gibson Rant Quotes (Presented By Kittens)

I just stumbled upon a news story about Simon Cowell, prominent English guy (for what I can’t remember – America’s Got Talent?) supporting the Katie Piper fund.

When I read the story I remembered where I’ve seen her – I saw a Channel 4 documentary about her a while back and was absolutely amazed at how brave she is and what a horrible ordeal she’s had to go through.

To make the story short (as as much as I remember from the film) she was a model and TV presenter, dating someone who seemed really nice but turned out to be the ultimate nightmare. After he’d raped her for hours, she made it home and broke off contact with him but was too afraid to press charges. Days later he had a friend wait for her outside her apartment and throw acid into her face, permanently disfiguring her.

The acid burned through all four layers of skin on her face, some spilled down her throat and she was left blind in one eye.
She has undergone more than 40 operations on her face and throat including groundbreaking surgery at Chelsea and Westminster Hospital.

I remember seeing that documentary and wondering if I would ever recover from that sort of thing – she had her whole life ahead of her, everything going for her – she was (still is, I think) beautiful, had a great career going, fun friends, etc. – and ended up in horrendous pain, needing constant care from her parents and countless operations. And for what, just because she had the misfortune of dating a lunatic. After the assault, she was afraid to leave the house, obviously everyone stared, but she made it. Would you? Would I? I don’t know. I think I might’ve spiraled into a life-long “why me?!” depression.

Until I read the news story with Cowell, I didn’t realize she’s started a fund. Treatment for people with severe burns and scars is enormously expensive and not every insurance covers it. Many victims have to live with the disfigurement fort the rest of their lives and simply can’t afford any help to get through it – this help would include treatments but also psychotherapy, or even makeup classes (there is such thing as „camouflage“ makeup, for example). It’s not only about trying to heal the wounds as best as possible but also rebuilding victims’ self-esteem and dealing with the way they look now, dealing with the looks they get from other people.

The foundation’s vision is to create a n advanced burn and scar management and rehabilitation clinic in the UK accessible to anybody who would benefit from specialised treatments. This will include daily pressure therapy using controlled, standardised and customised care with the help of LPG Endermologie machines, manual massage, physiotherapy, hydrotherapy and silicone treatment.

The clinic will also be a place where people can learn to overcome the psychological barriers of living with disfigurement and concentrate on rebuilding their lives.

The foundation also aims to offer non-medical advice to empower people and build up their confidence by showing them how to look and feel their best again. This would include professional lessons on camouflage makeup and hair styling as well as a mentorship program that brings burns survivors together to support each other.

Yeah, I guess there are tons of other worthy causes – children starving, our world as we know it being ruined (thank you, BP), but pick whichever one you feel a connection to, I say. Helping any cause at all is better than doing nothing. Lots of people who have lost loved ones to cancer support cancer causes; if you have friends or family who have been disfigured by burns, this might be a good cause for you to support. I don’t personally know anyone who has been disfigured, by the way, but I just find her story very inspirational. Maybe because I saw the film, I don’t know.

Here’s more info:

The Katie Piper Foundation

Just my 2 cents for today…

’70s board game contains eerie BP oil spill scenarios

The game BP Offshore Oil Strike, which came out in the 1970s and is adorned with an old BP logo, revolves around four players exploring for oil, building platforms and constructing pipelines – all in the name of being the first to make $120 million.

But like the real-life oil game there are some big hazards, too. Players have to deal with the possibility of large-scale oil spills and cover cleanup costs. You struggle with “hazard cards” that include phrases now part of our daily vernacular, including: “Blow-out! Rig damaged. Oil slick cleanup costs. Pay $1 million.”